Fanfiction – Harry Potter and The Iron Lady

Posted on 2019-05-05 by Stephan Sokolow

For today’s fic, a little something I found because someone else thought I already knew it. Thanks a bunch, Aura Of The Dawn.

Harry Potter and The Iron Lady by mugglesftw

This is a story that had such potential for me to love it, and has a ton of excellent writing… but then messes it up because the author didn’t see what was trying to develop.

The plot starts simply. Suppose Ron Weasley’s squib uncle decided to join the military instead of becoming an accountant, and a chance encounter gave Margaret Thatcher’s frustration at Voldemort’s first reign of terror an outlet. She founds the “Committee of Magical Affairs” (or “Maggie Works” as its members originally from the military take to calling it) and things progress from there. They quickly discover Harry Potter’s situation and one of their members offers to adopt him, since he and his wife had been wanting a second child but the risk of complications in childbirth might kill her.

Up until Quirrelmort is forced to act early during Harry’s first year at Hogwarts, this works beautifully and it has two major aspects which make it especially unusual and satisfying for me.

First, it’s a story that goes above and beyond to make characters interesting. For example, Professor McGonagall’s obsession with quidditch is fleshed out with appropriate bits of flavour text. We also get to see this little treat during a snowball fight:

“We should just surrender,” Hermione said, shivering slightly in the cold .
“The Irish never surrender!” Seamus bellowed, managing to hit Fred with a snowball before he was beaten back under a deluge of icy missiles.
“But we’re not Irish!” Hermione said, dragging Seamus back to safety.
“Speak for yourself!” Neville yelled as he began digging in the snow to form a new barricade and switching to an Irish lilt. “Me mum’s maiden name was Murphy!”
“I knew there was a reason I loved you Neville!” Seamus sputtered, wiping the snow off his face.

Snape is probably the most interesting case of this, because he’s believably cast as a character you can like, without him having met Harry before he comes to Hogwarts, and without Harry having a terrible home life.

He’s still acerbic and self-interested, but didn’t let his hatred of James Potter blind him from seeing the true nature of this Harry who insists on going by his adoptive parents’ family name rather than Potter.

Likewise, when he manages to suss out the little conspiracy that Harry’s a part of, he sees a potential “third option” which won’t leave him trapped between an insane madman and a barmy old fool. It’s all done in a believable way and his loyalty to Lily’s memory over either of his supposed masters is done in a way which feels much more satisfyingly realistic than in canon, where the focus on Harry’s perception of him really crippled Rowling’s ability to develop him as a character.

The second thing this first act does well is that it’s a story explicitly focused on merging the two worlds.

Harry’s adoptive father, being an SAS member and part of the Maggie Works has raised him as most fanfic authors would expect a properly on-the-side-of-good Dumbledore to. He had a good childhood, but he was given martial arts lessons from a young age, as well as carefully supervised shooting training, and he was given ready access to superhero comics likely to give him the right outlook on his abilities.

As a result, by the time Harry is told that he’s adopted at age 8, and that he’s a wizard, they’ve developed mechanisms for hardening electronics against magical interference and Harry winds up seeing his abilities with an appropriately childish but responsible view: Like superheroes such as SpiderMan, he’s an ordinary person with special abilities and it’s his responsibility to use them to help others.

However, that isn’t at the front of your mind when you’re reading the story. (Which is a good thing because I’m rather tired of “super Harry” stories.) More time is spent on Harry either changing people’s minds or provoking people by like Draco Malfoy by threatening their flawed worldview, and his interactions with his friends.

Examples of that include introducing Ron and his siblings to non-magical entertainment like Tetris on Game Boy when they visit and Harry asking his parents to owl over his book on the Apollo missions, which causes a stir with Draco and rekindles Fred and George’s childhood obsession with space.

He also integrates Hermione into the group early, when Ron sees her use a knockback jinx against Draco and his goons on the Hogwarts Express, and befriends Neville Longbottom. I’m not sure what the magic ingredient is, but I find the resulting “golden four, not golden trio” dynamic that develops to be both quite satisfying and oddly unique.

The story puts a lot of effort into being familiar to canon, yet original… something both rare and the mark of an author who has skill in spades. From the troll being defeated by confusing it with repeated uses of Scourgify until Snape arrives, to McGonagall and Snape successfully pressuring Dumbledore to deal with Quirrelmort early and Harry’s friends being present for the drama while Harry is elsewhere and unconscious, the events leading up to Chapter 17 really do feel like a plausible alternative series of dominoes that could have fallen, given the small change at the beginning.

I’d also like to mention a few other details I have yet to see anywhere else:

First, the antagonistic relationship between Harry and Sirius. I think this is the first time I’ve ever read a decent fic where they’re at odds because Sirius refuses to accept that Harry sees two muggles as his real parents to the point where he changed his name.

Second, showing a werewolf’s first full moon from their perspective. (I won’t say who, because it’d be a spoiler.)

Third, this brilliantly creative little quote:

Ginny just shrugged. “Who knows? Luna knows all kinds of things that she probably shouldn’t, because her father doesn’t really monitor what she says or does. Do you know, he put her in muggle school for a few weeks, then forgot about it and my dad had to send in the obliviators everyone because they thought a child was missing?”

(Why is it that the typos always seem to prefer to show up in the most quotable bits?)

Broadly speaking, when it comes to the good parts, I’ve read various stories which incorporate the elements it uses, but none as satisfying. All the others either don’t go far enough, or implement them in too crude a manner.

The problems start to mount around chapter 15 when Quirrelmort is forced to make a break for it… and kills three named characters.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not one of those people who is categorically against killing off named characters… but it just feels shallow and sloppy. From this point on, the story gets worse, then better, then much worse, because “upping the drama” crowds out everything that made the chapters before so special.

It also doesn’t help that the author seems to fundamentally misunderstand the nature of the Harry Potter setting. Rowling worked very hard to leave things like religion in the HP setting up to the reader’s imagination, with the few elements that one would associate with religion being a self-neutralizing mish-mash of secular contemporary elements and things you’d expect to keep pagan beliefs alive. (eg. Ron Weasley saying “Happy Christmas, Harry” and being focused on the presents rather than talking about Yule, while things like ghosts and the Deathly Hallows suggest that, if anyone’s right, it was the pagans.)

Most good fanfiction authors (and even the mediocre ones) either preserve that feel or build a suitably canon-compatible conception of “wizarding paganism”. This story, on the other hand, is clearly written by a Christian who didn’t stop to think about whether the elements of their faith would be compatible with the elements shown in canon.

For example, chapter 18 feels like a phoned-in Christmas special of sub-standard writing quality and, aside from the Weasleys using “Merry Christmas” multiple times and acting as if they were at some kind of non-magical vernacular cram session while off-camera, they also talk about “praying for” people… something that lends a distinctively “American Christian” feel to these British members of a minority who were canonically persecuted by Christians. (See “Witch Burnings”)

Yes, the latter half of the chapter is spent with muggles who are probably Anglicans, but they’re still saying “Merry Christmas” rather than “Happy Christmas” like muggle Brits do and, given that things like the bible are never mentioned in HP canon, which does depict Christmas, it still feels gratuitous and unnecessary and contributes to making the chapter feel out of place. My advice is to just skip it. You won’t be missing anything important as far as I can tell.

(To be honest, the overall writing quality of chapter 18 compared to earlier chapters with similar elements sort of reminds me of the difference between Rick Cook’s The Wiz Biz and its sequels. He wrote something great, but then didn’t properly understand what made it so special, so the sequels feel like cheap cargo cult copies, matching the superficial details of their successful predecessor, but without the deeper underpinnings which made it work.)

Now, the good thing is that the Christian stuff is shoehorned in and the story wouldn’t feel like it’s missing anything if you were to copy the text into your favourite word processor and delete all mentions of God, the church, and prayer. The bad thing is that, if you don’t, there is a really problematic bit where the author arbitrarily adds holy water to the list of things that can destroy a horcrux, but then writes it out for being known to strip away a wizard’s magic and, thus, kill them.

I could write an entire blog post about how fundamentally broken an idea that is in the Harry Potter setting, but, in the name of brevity, I’ll just say that it reminds me of a particularly sick and twisted piece of rhetoric from American Christians that basically says “If you use God’s power to murder someone, you’ll go to heaven. If you use magic not of God to heal someone, you’ve earned eternal damnation.” (That is, that even the most sick and depraved things are moral if God says so, but power not from God will damn you no matter how virtuous a use you put it to.)

I’m also worried about how the author presents a conclusion Dumbledore and company have jumped to that Harry gave up The Potter Family Magic™ and made Neville the Boy Who Lived when he took on his adopted family’s name. It’s bad enough that unbreakable vows exist in Harry Potter canon (where there’s ceremony and some degree of knowledge that you’re making a consequential decision) without doubling down on what makes them a problem. I’ll admit that it’s possible that Dumbledore and friends are mistaken and grasping at straws, but the way reminders of it are paced makes it feel more like foreshadowing. Leave this “names have power that you can use to hang yourself without realizing it” stuff to settings like The Dresden Files which are supposed to be inherently dark. (Especially when it’s such a stupid idea to imply that all canon Harry had to do to achieve being “just Harry” like he wanted was to literally cast off the Potter name at the horrendous cost of “becoming ‘just Harry'”.)

However, fundamentally, the problem with the story is that it has three phases: Great, Good, and Mediocre… in that order.

After Quirrelmort makes a break for it, the story just isn’t the same. The parts which showed the most promise (like the battle of ideas between Harry and Draco, the Weasley Twins’ interest in rocketry, and introducing Harry’s friends to the muggle things they’ve been missing out on) get crowded out, some parts (eg. chapter 22) feel rushed, and the plot swings in a direction that I’ve already read a million times before and grown tired of.

Then, near the end, it kicks out into open war against the Voldemort-infiltrated ministry and muggle Britain’s emergency broadcast provisions are used to shatter the Statute of Secrecy.

I will have to admit, despite not being the “Military, F*** Yeah” type, I did find it satisfying to see the incredibly rare twist of having open conflict break out between a secret branch of the British muggle military and aurors sent by the Voldemort-infiltrated Ministry of Magic. However, while it is satisfying in the moment to see the muggle side uses their emergency broadcast provisions to shatter the Statute of Secrecy, I’ve yet to see a fic which survives such a drastic change. Given that the final author’s note makes it clear that the sequel will be even more different, I’m not sure if it would interest me but, if I do decide to read it, I don’t have high hopes. Even before you include the implications of all-out world war, chapter 52 is already feeling far too similar to various other fics I read and found wanting. (Mostly male power fantasies with horribly simplistic views of human nature and the causes of our social problems which enable the hero to become a benevolent dictator.)

When you break from canon that drastically, you “cut the umbilical cord”. Just counting the ones that are either pure Harry Potter or have it as the primary story in a crossover, I’ve read over a thousand of these fics and only one of them readily comes to mind as being written with the requisite skill to pull that off and survive. (The Pureblood Pretense series)

That said, I can at least try to analyze the problem, and it seems to stem from three issues: First, it’s just plain difficult (possibly impossible) to properly prepare readers for such a drastic shift in the kind of story that’s being told. Second, when you have a story that’s had this kind of character focus, it’s like threading a needle to acknowledge something of such a massive scope as the outbreak of a world war while still maintaining a healthy character focus, and this didn’t feel like it pulled that off. Finally, Harry Potter fanfiction is almost universally written around a worldview that works in pure fantasy and some kinds of science fiction, but is unacceptably simplistic when applied to a contemporary setting where history and personal experience make it abundantly clear how complex human society is.

The story would have flowed much more naturally if chapter 52 had been omitted and the relevant details were fed to the reader slowly, as they were made known to Harry and company. Heck, the best solution would have been to follow the slow-burn progression in the Queen Who Fell To Earth series. It’d have allowed what worked so beautifully about the pre-Quirrelmort chapters to continue to shine.

I think the biggest thing the story does get right is the amount of time and effort spent on characters and ideas who/which were present in canon, but could have been developed more. I didn’t notice many technical errors, but there are a few. The most consistent one seems to be using “Mrs.” to address or refer to characters like Nymphadora Tonks when “Ms.” seems to have been intended.

Overall, I think I have to give it a 3.7 out of 5 (0.7 on a more intuitive scale from -2 to +2). The early stuff is at least a 4.5 out of 5, chapter 18 is a 2.5 out of 5, what follows is more of a 4.0 out of 5, and the breakout of hostilities at the end is a 3.5 at best.

(While the early stuff has a spark and uniqueness, the drama which takes the forefront following Quirrelmort’s break lacks that spark and isn’t particularly novel, regardless of how well-executed it is.)

If it weren’t so easy to edit out the out-of-place religious stuff without leaving any traces that something had been removed, I’d have rated it even lower.

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Novel – Eon

Posted on 2019-05-04 by Stephan Sokolow

UPDATE 2019-05-18: I found some other notes I’d lost under a pile of other TODOs and have revised this again with more critiques of specific details.

Branching out, I thought I’d share my thoughts on some non-fan fiction I’ve been reading:

Eon by Greg Bear

While it may seem ironic (If you’re not familiar with leanings of the FiMFiction.net user base) I was actually introduced to this novel in the comments to a My Little Pony crossover named The Long Trot. (A sadly far-too-incomplete crossover with Pratchett and Baxter’s The Long Earth, which has also been added to my “to read” list.)

The basic plot is that, in the year 2000, in a timeline where the Soviet Union never fell (the book was written in 1985), an asteroid appears from a flash of light in the outer solar system and manoeuvres itself into orbit. When we go up to investigate it, we find that it’s been hollowed out into multiple chambers, containing two abandoned cities, machinery to keep it habitable… and a rearmost chamber that stretches on into infinity. A pocket universe unto itself. (later revealed to be known as “The Way”)

As a teaser, I’ll quote the ending of the fourth chapter, given that none of this is a spoiler, being summarized on the back-cover synopsis:

The Stanford professor, six years before, had been wrong. Someone besides extraterrestials and gods could appreciate her work. She now knew why she had been brought up from Vandenberg, carried to the Stone by shuttle and OTV.

The asteroid was longer on the inside than it was on the outside.

The seventh chamber went on forever.

The main character who the story initially follows, and the subject of that quote, is Patricia Luisa Vasquez, a physicist who’s brought in on the top-secret project to study “The Stone” after it’s discovered that it came from a possible future in which Russia touched off a nuclear world war… and, if not prevented, it’s only weeks away.

That said, I don’t want you to think that it’s some kind of political thriller. The story’s central focus is very much one of mystery, focused heavily on the question of what the infinite seventh chamber is and how it was built, with a chapter every so often switching to the perspective of a character from the civilization that built the Stone who is secretly investigating the main cast.

It actually reminds me of my experiences playing the PC game adaptation of Arthur C. Clarke’s Rendezvous with Rama, then moving on to reading Rama Revealed (the last in the series) at my high school library.

My biggest problem with the story is that it gave me a strong sense of being slow to start. While it wasn’t as bad as Tau Zero by Poul Anderson (which felt like a soap opera in space for almost the entire story, but I didn’t care about the characters), the first act felt dull to me. It wasn’t until the later acts (specifically, starting with Chapter 21) that things started to pick up and shift from focusing on characters I didn’t care enough about to actually exploring The Way and the futuristic humans who live in a city far down its length.

I would really have preferred something more like Larry Niven’s Ringworld or Jules Verne’s Journey to the Center of the Earth, where the primary focus is on exploring this wondrous place they’ve discovered or, at the very least, a synopsis which warned me that it would spend so much focus on the mundane aspects of things for so long. (Properly representative synopses are, sadly, a greatly under-appreciated skill. When I read David Brin’s Sundiver, I glossed through pretty much the entire book before I realized that the politics were actually the focus of the plot, rather than just a slow start to the plot I actually wanted to read about the mystery of the “sun-ghosts”.)

That said, around the same time that it started to pick up, it also seemed to get a little more philosophical (or at least more focused on the philosophical elements) and that made it more enjoyable in the vein I was intended to be enjoying it via, as opposed to the one I’d expected… so it’s still not clear to me whether the story was focused on things I didn’t care about or just a slow-starter regardless of who’s reading it. Given that I also found the action-related elements more engaging after chapter 21 and the exploratory elements picked up too, I’m leaning toward “this story just took far too long to wind up”.

In support of that assessment, I found chapter 57 boring in a “throwback to the first act” sort of way, but chapter 58 had some philosophical elements which made me wish the whole story had more of a philosophical bent.

It wouldn’t surprise me if I draw some flak for saying this about such a lauded author, but I get the impression that Greg Bear needed a more assertive editor. Someone who could hold him to that principle of “Make an accurate first impression.” (Which many authors have stated in the more prone-to-misinterpretation form, “Start right into the action.”) As-is, the first twenty chapters feel so different (and so much less engaging) that it’s almost like it was meant to be two different books. (Similar to how Anne McCaffrey’s Pern series has at least half a dozen different novels following different people at the same momentous time.)

To be honest, it reminds me of the behaviour I had to be trained out of as a kid, where I’d try to front-load every ancillary detail before I’d given the listener a reason to care in order to try to dump my entire mindstate into the other person’s head before I started my “pitch”. Because there was no relevance given when they were initially introduced, later chapters left me engaged enough to appreciate the significance of various questions being raised, and I knew I’d been given the answers to them, but I didn’t care enough to go back and refresh my memory of what they were now that I knew they were relevant after all.

I also think that it doesn’t age as well as it could have, given what a classic idea it is. The most glaring example of that is details like the names of the factions among the future humans (Geshels and Naderites). I was born the same year this book was written and I only have a very vague idea of who Ralph Nader is and what made him important. That will only get worse as time passes. (However, the commentary on how China might overtake NATO and the Soviet Union in a couple of generations is prescient.)

It’s similar to how, in the 20th Anniversary Edition of William Gibson’s Neuromancer, he says that his one regret was mentioning the sound of typewriter keys or how the part of some works of fanfiction that has aged the most glaringly is to mention MySpace. One can never be sure how well something will age until after its time has passed, so we should strive to not tempt fate in our cultural references. (A good rule of thumb is to speak in generalities and fictional names. “Social network” rather than “MySpace”, for example.)

Not aging well may also be part of the problem with the synopsis. It mentions a war breaking out on Earth as a result, but it didn’t really hit me that such a war would involve a nuclear exchange, so the synopsis seemed underwhelming. That could just be because it was written in 1985, before the Cold War ended, and I’m reading it in 2019.

Now for specific things Bear got right. I could be wrong, but it seemed that the story only started to switch between the different facets and factions of the story within chapters (rather than at the chapter breaks) when things started to come to a head. I found that to be a very clever way to manage the pacing.

I also found it very satisfying that, in the end, The Way becomes self-sustaining and I wish the creative world-building from chapter 62 could have been more prevalent earlier on.

That said, maybe it’s just me, but I can’t help but dwell on the bittersweet elements of the climactic ending (starting in chapter 64). I know there are poetic parallels between The Death and the changes to The Way, but, for me, what’s lost with The Way sours the sense of hope for the future. (For all that I hate change I didn’t initiate, I’d certainly be a Geshel. I’ve always been the type who sees films like Hayao Miyazaki’s Castle in the Sky as not having a proper happy ending because they imply that the ancient lost tech was destroyed beyond studying and, if the scientists and researchers in the setting are going to re-create it, they’ll have to do it from scratch.)

Still, the title drop in epilogue 3 does help to make the ending satisfying. I didn’t watch Babylon 5 as a kid, but it reminds me of a synopsis I read of the ending to it. (To the point where I wonder if J. Michael Straczynski might have read Eon and was drawing a little inspiration from it.)

That said, epilogue 4 left too much of a “sequel hook” feeling. There’s nothing wrong with a sequel hook, but this one left things feeling unresolved in a way that reminds me more of Diana Wynne Jones’s decision to not include epilogues in Dark Lord of Derkholm and Year of the Griffin or, as I’ll blog about in the near future, John Scalzi’s Redshirts.

(It’s a little snide, but it left with the urge to say “Maybe if you didn’t take so long getting everything set up, you’d have had time to give us a properly satisfying ending.”)

All in all, it lives up to the claims of it being a sci-fi classic, but with a disappointing lean toward Mark Twain’s definition: “something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. ” It’s not in the “hook ya quick, stay fast and punchy” style that seems to have been winning out in fiction, the story has two distinct phases which appeal to two different kinds of readers, and it makes references which won’t outlive its cultural context. That said, the setting is excellent and I’m surprised it doesn’t seem to have even one game adaptation when Dune got an adventure game and three RTS games, Ringworld got two adventure games, Gateway got two adventure games, and Riverworld got an RTS.

Given that I enjoy novel takes on the universal/multiversal construction of settings, I definitely enjoy this book for the setting, just as I enjoyed Piers Anthony’s Mode series, the film adaptation of Neil Gaiman’s Stardust that I wandered in on, and as I anticipate enjoying The Long Earth, the Spiral series (which I also was introduced to via fanfiction), and the fanfictional village of Eezdraug , which I think I remember being inspired by The Way.

Final Verdict: Worth a read, but go into it knowing that it’s slow for the first 20 chapters.

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A Balanced Exploration of Arguments For and Against Ape-like Cryptids

Posted on 2018-12-24 by Stephan Sokolow

I was watching some old documentaries on YouTube and a particular one on Bigfoot made some points I hadn’t considered in my conclusion that it was just a mix of myth and hoax.

Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t become a believer, but I now don’t feel that there’s enough evidence to solidly disbelieve either. (Luckily, I don’t really have an emotional connection to either outcome, and that ambivalence makes it easy to sit on the fence.)

Arguments Against

So, why was I so certain that Bigfoot didn’t exist before? Mostly because I had the following strong arguments which grouped Bigfoot in with other things that everyone agrees to be fake:

First (and most convincingly), now that everyone has a cameraphone in their pocket and an entire generation is obsessed with getting attention using it, we should be seeing a lot more evidence. Evidence for real phenomena doesn’t stay flat as the number of people with the will and means to gather it grows exponentially.

The BBC had a whole series, Nature’s Weirdest Events, built entirely around this idea and the fact that, with the massive number of people carrying cameras now, even very rare occurrences are getting conclusive recordings made.

Second, in 2017, they finally did DNA analysis on purported Yeti remnants (fur samples caught on vegetation in valleys, scalps kept as relics, etc.) and every single one was conclusively determined to not be from an unknown primate. Some were potentially from an unknown type of bear, but the only conclusively positive result that was surprising was that, judging by the fur samples, the Himalayan goral has a larger range than we thought.

Third, oral histories (in any culture) tend to blend myth and reality in ways that mislead those who try to extract reality from them without being experts, and Bigfoot believers invariably brush this under the rug.

Fourth, it’s very rare for large animals to remain undiscovered. The countless new species we continue to discover tend to be insects, small reptiles and amphibians, plants, and fungi. When we do discover new large species, thet tend to live in the deep ocean, which has been compared to the moon in remoteness.

Fifth, it’s suspicious that humans would have legends of such cryptids on every continent with aboriginal populations, including Australia, when we only have such a large range because we’re a tropical species who developed fire and clothing.

Finally, Bigfoot believers tend to set up a false dichotomy that, with all this evidence, it must either be true or some grand conspiracy to commit a hoax. However, we humans have a history of cognitive biases producing odd results.

It doesn’t have to be a global conspiracy to engage in a hoax if our neurobiology is inherently biased toward developing the concept of “wild men of the wilderness” in the same way that it’s inherently biased toward inventing gods to explain nature.

When people see something they’re not certain about, they tend to fill in the details based on whatever cultural zeitgeist is floating around in their heads. One of the books I’ve read (probably Carl Sagan’s The Demon-Haunted World) went into detail on how the post-World War 2 UFO craze caused a rapid shift in interpretations of existing events like sleep paralysis.

UPDATE: Likewise, as demonstrated by LEMMiNO’s Bygone Visions of Cosmic Neighbors, even scientists tend to fight hard against giving up preconceptions that we want to be true, such as the idea that intelligent life exists on planets in our solar system other than Earth.

It also doesn’t help that, often, the lack of increased evidence in response to increased technology is justified by the special pleading that ape-like cryptids are smart enough to have learned to be more elusive in step with our developing technology.

Arguments For

So, with all that strongly leaning away from Bigfoot being real, what did the documentary say that cast it back into doubt?

First, it pointed out two things that I had never seen mentioned in any other documentary, and which hadn’t occurred to me before:

  1. It’s rare to find animals remains in the wild, because they tend to retreat to die, and, when it’s not dead livestock in the middle of a wide-open pasture (with no cover and possibly a guard donkey or llama), scavengers are very efficient.
  2. Animals like Bigfoot and the Yeti are said to live in areas which are still rugged and sparsely-populated to this day.

As the anthropologist they interviewed said, there are at least 100 bears for every Bigfoot and he’s never found a bear that died a natural death, just lying there in the wild.

That ties in with an important detail I already did know: Some animals are very shy. Heck, even primates we know about can present supporting evidence. Western scientists didn’t acquire specimens of the mountain gorilla and bonobo until 1902 and the 1920s, respectively.

According to one believer in Bigfoot whose videos I watch because he applies enough skeptical argumentation to make them interesting and entertaining whether or not you consider them credible, we have enough trouble with known primates:

  • People who haven’t worked with wild chimpanzees and other great apes underestimate how aware they are of automatic cameras that have been placed in their habitats. When they’re caught on camera, it’s because they choose to be.
  • The reason it took so long to learn what we know about the Bili/Bondo apes (a population of chimpanzees) is that, to avoid bush-meat hunters, they don’t allow themselves to be seen within 20km of a road… and these are animals we know to exist. [1]

Beyond that, from observations of other shy species, it’s perfectly plausible to conclude that there exist species so shy that they are likely to go extinct from competition for habitat before we ever encounter them and it’s plausible that Europeans, having a more industrialized and less in-tune-with nature lifestyle, produce a larger “radius of deterrence” compared to aboriginal peoples.

There were a couple of other points made in the documentary regarding pre-Columbian evidence (some native carvings that seem too consistently ape-like and a claim that Leif Erikson encountered a “forest spirit” that doesn’t fit the description of of a Native American), but I had to discard them since I couldn’t find any solid online corroboration and I don’t care enough to go poking through offline sources.

Third Option: Maybe Bigfoot once existed but doesn’t now

Everybody seems to be so caught up in taking sides that I’ve never seen anyone address this possibility. Maybe all the 20th century stuff is hoaxes and wishful thinking, but there really is something to the native myths.

Difficulty in testing it aside, it’s certainly a reasonable hypothesis. Tribal history doesn’t really care about precisely recording how long ago the most recent encounter was, and there is strong evidence of pre-industrialized humans driving animals to extinction even when we don’t outright hunt them. (Jared Diamond’s The Third Chimpanzee mentions that, for example.)

All in all, I think you can see why I adopted the more scientist-ish viewpoint of “What do I believe? I believe that the evidence is inconclusive.” (Though, as always, “extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence”, so I lean toward nonexistence.)

In the end, I think eDNA will probably rule one way or another in the not too distant future. It’s already put the final nail in the coffin for the Loch Ness Monster in any reasonable person’s eyes. (See TREY the Explainer’s previous videos on the Loch Ness Monster for my reasons to say “final nail”.)

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Fanfiction – Being Harry Potter

Posted on 2018-12-12 by Stephan Sokolow

Kirinin really has a knack for writing fanfiction that has a special spark to it. I first recognized that when I was looking for Ranma ½ fanfiction and read The Pit. This time, it’s a Harry Potter – Draco Malfoy body-swap fic with a difference:

Being Harry Potter by Kirinin

The basic concept is that Draco Malfoy wakes up as Harry Potter in year 6, with no idea what happened.

I don’t want to say much about the plot, but I will say that it follows Draco and he discovers the “who” and “why” in chapter 2… but it turns out to be a big and very novel plot twist.

This is not your ordinary “they have to lay low and slowly gain an understanding of each other as they wait for a solution” fic. (And I do really love the foreshadowed reason for the “why” to backfire on the “who”.)

Instead, it’s a tantalizing blend of “lay low because I’m too ‘set adrift’ to think of a better plan”, stuff I don’t want to spoil, and scenes that could be in a more ordinary body-swap fic, but most authors wouldn’t think of them.

Now, as a more specific example which isn’t a spoiler, I do really like the interaction between Snape and “Harry” during a detention. Draco’s preconceptions about Harry do evoke some interesting character-exploring behaviour from the both of them.

There’s also a delightfully clever “No, wait. Bad mental image.” moment in chapter 6, though I can’t quote it because it depends on details which would constitute a spoiler.

I let my note-taking slip somewhere around the middle of reading it, and I don’t have time to re-read it right now, so I can’t go into detail beyond that point (to the degree I usually would), but Draco’s character evolves very nicely throughout the story and there are some very elegant little touches (such as the role a certain jacket ends up playing).

I also found the manner in which Voldemort met his end to have a particular poetic cleverness to it.

I will mention that there is a moment when a male-male relationship comes up and the character being into guys had no basis in canon. While I have no problem with that sort of thing in and of itself, I do feel like the way it was introduced detracts from the narrative as a whole. That said, it’s quite minor so, if you just treat it as one flawed scene and keep reading, it should quickly get carried away as you get back into the flow of the story.

Before I put this review on the back burner, somewhere around the middle of the story, I estimated that I’d probably give it a 4.7 out of 5 rating because I wasn’t feeling that sense of certainly I normally associate with a 5 out of 5. While I’d probably need to re-read it in one sitting to be sure, that does seem about right.

Posted in Fanfiction | Leave a comment

Resources for Reverse-Engineering 16-bit Applications

Posted on 2018-12-02 by Stephan Sokolow

See Also: My list of tips and resources for writing new DOS and Win16 apps

While offering some advice, I got a little caught up in the research I was doing, so here’s a list of the resources I found for picking apart 16-bit x86 applications.

Reference Materials

Unpackers/Unprotectors

In the days of DOS and Windows 3.x, executable packers and code protectors like PKLite and PackWin were a common means of saving precious disk space, as well as deterring casual inspection of an executable by novices with tools like DEBUG.COM.

They still see use to this day, but exponential decline in the cost of storage space, combined with the risk of false positives from virus scanners, has reduced the demand for this sort of software. (Aside from JavaScript minifiers, for which an effect similar to a decompiler can be achieved using a code beautifier.)

When it comes to reverse-engineering, packed/protected executables must be unpacked/unprotected before utilities which operate on the on-disk form of the program will return useful results.

UNP for DOS
A now-unmaintained but open-source utility which will handle the vast majority of packed executables for DOS and Windows 3.x.
Universal Extractor for Windows
A tool which combines code and algorithms from a great many unpacking tools not covered by UNP into one convenient package… including various tools for unpacking installers without running them.
UPX for all major platforms
The most popular executable packer today and also capable of unpacking its own creations, assuming they haven’t been modified to obscure their nature.
archive of exetools.com
the Wayback Machine’s October 2002 archive of this site contains a huge list of more esoteric unpacking tools.
The ‘Executable compression’ section of the Archive Team wiki
A list of DOS (and some Windows 3.1x) executable packers, some with the ability to unpack what they’ve packed.

Decompilers

Decompilers attempt to retrieve something higher-level than assembly language from a program.

This may be the normal state of things if the language doesn’t compile to machine code or it may be a convenience accomplished by looking for patterns of machine instructions that are known to come from specific higher level constructs like for and function calls.

(For languages which compile to machine code, you get something half-way between assembly language and the original source code, because the compiler threw out various higher-level details which would be needed to perfectly reconstruct the original source.)

Reko for Windows
According to the old SourceForge page (which has screenshots), this open-source decompiler’s list of noteworthy supported formats includes MS-DOS, Win32 and AmigaOS.
The release notes on GitHub mention adding support for NE-format EXEs (Windows 3.x and OS/2), SEGA Genesis, SEGA Dreamcast, NeoGeo, partial support for Atari-TOS, and improving support for MacOS Classic (though I couldn’t find the initial mention of adding it).
DoDi’s Visual Basic 3/4 Decompiler for Windows
The site refers to this freeware tool as a Visual Basic 4 decompiler, but the tool is originally for decompiling Visual Basic 3 and, if the newer version is limited to Visual Basic 4, the site also provides links for earlier versions specifically intended for Visual Basic 3.
DisC – Decompiler for Turbo C 2.0/2.01 (source)
A decompiler specifically for programs built using Borland Turbo C 2.0 and 2.01 (which is offered as a free download by Embarcadero).

Disassemblers

Disassemblers are what you need if you want to inspect the code in its entirety when it’s not running

They’re generally more reliable than decompilers, and preserve the correspondences to the machine-code form necessary to design patches.

Compared to debuggers, they tend to have more advanced searching features (to make up for the lack of ability to find things by running the code until you hit a breakpoint), but can’t deal with especially dynamic code where the behaviour is most easily understood by running it.

All Formats

semblance (source)
An open-source, non-interactive disassembler for MZ (DOS), NZ (Win16), and PE (Win32) executables.
Doesn’t explicitly mention which platforms are supported, but it works on Linux and I suspect it’ll build on any POSIX-compliant platform (eg. MacOS, Cygwin, etc.).
TatraDAS (GUI for Win32, CLI for Linux)
Open-source disassembler with support for MZ, NE, PE, and .com executables. Unlike semblance, doesn’t seem to dump non-code segments.
CLI version is claimed to be OS independent, but I haven’t verified that claim.

DOS MZ Format

IDA Pro Freeware v5.0  for Windows
It’s hard to beat the IDA Pro disassembler and the 5.0 release, which is free for non-commercial use, can disassemble DOS MZ and 32-bit Windows PE binaries.
The ScummVM developers have requested and received permission to host a copy to ensure it will always be available to people wanting to add new game engine re-implementations to ScummVM. If my link breaks, check the HOWTO-Reverse Engineering page on the ScummVM wiki.
In my testing, this ran just fine on non-Windows platforms under Wine. (See also PlayOnLinux and PlayOnMac as easy ways to manage Wine versions and application prefixes.)

Windows 3.x NE Format

URSoft W32Dasm (A.K.A. Win32Dasm) for Windows 9x
Don’t let the name fool you. This tool disassembles both 16-bit and 32-bit Windows EXEs and, from what I remember in my high school years, it was by far the most comfortable option around.
Sadly, it appears to have been the result of a one-man operation with a website run on his ISP’s hosting, and it vanished from the web some time between February 2002 and May 2003, with its most recent version listing a 1998 copyright date in the About box.
When I was poking around, I found it not at all difficult to find the most recent registered version, but I couldn’t find a citation to back up the claims made by some sites that the last release is freeware that never received a patch to remove the warning about not sharing it, rather than so-called abandonware. (It could go either way. There is precedent for official freeware re-releases with warnings left intact and the author didn’t bother to update the copyright date in the image in question from 1995 to 1998.) As such, I will not provide a link to it.
From what I remember, it can be finicky about which Wine versions it will work under. (It won’t crash… it’ll just fail to load its desired monospace font and display useless placeholder glyphs.)
Windows CodeBack [2] [3] for DOS 3.x+
The Wine developer wiki recommends this disassembler for Win16 executables.
If my links ever go dead, it won’t be difficult to find as wcb105a.zip in various archives of old shareware and freeware. Like IDA Pro Freeware, it’s free for non-commercial use, and the features withheld for paying users are ones you’re not likely to need.
However, my quick tests seem to indicate that it’s a purely non-interactive, command-line disassembler.
In my testing, this ran perfectly well in DOSBox 0.74.
MBBSDASM for .NET Core
An open-source, non-interactive disassembler for NZ (Win16) executables with supplementary features for Major BBS modules.

Debuggers

Debuggers are what you need for inspecting code while it’s running. They take some getting used to, but their versatility is unmatched.

More advanced debuggers even support “reverse debugging” allowing you to get the program to a point of interest, like the manifestation of a bug, then rewind its execution to explore how you wound up there.

DeGlucker for DOS
A protected-mode debugger which claims to be more powerful than Turbo Debugger and Soft ICE. Version 0.5 alpha, released in May of 2000,  is closed-source, but freeware.
Also offered is version 0.4 from January 1999, released with TASM x86 assembly source code under informally stated “do what you want but leave the attribution” terms after the original author no longer had time to maintain it.
Insight for DOS
A GPL-licensed real-mode debugger that gets suggested frequently. I don’t know whether it has any advantages over DeGlucker aside from being open-source and being usable on older, more limited hardware.
Open Watcom C/C++ for DOS and Windows
Open Watcom includes a complete set of tools, including DOS and Windows debuggers (WD.EXE and WDW.EXE) and a resource editor capable of poking around inside EXE files built by other compilers (WRE.EXE).
While Open Watcom hasn’t made use of the support it inherited for Windows 3.1 builds of the installer, all installers will install the DOS and Windows tools (even the Linux installer includes them), so you can use the DOS installer under Windows 3.1 as long as you don’t mind manually setting up the Windows bits.
WineDbg for POSIX (Linux, MacOS, etc.)
Wine‘s built-in debugging support can be used in two different ways:
  • Using the built-in command-line interface
  • Using an open-source graphical frontend like gdbgui, DDD, or kdbg via the gdbserver protocol.
DOSBox Debugger
The DOSBox emulator contains a debugger which can be enabled in special builds.
Win32 builds are provided, as well as instructions for making debug-enabled builds for other platforms.

Miscellaneous

Radare2
Radare2 is hard to classify because it does so much. Wikipedia summarizes it as “a complete framework for reverse-engineering and analyzing binaries”.
It supports DOS, Win32, Java, Gameboy, Gameboy Advance, Nintendo DS, Nintendo 3DS, Commodore VICE, WebAssembly, Android, and XBox binaries, among others.
According to the website, it can disassemble, assemble, debug, patch, be scripted in multiple languages, run on all major platforms, and more.
You’ll probably want to use the Cutter GUI with it.
Pixmap Prober
A quick little utility I hacked up for looking at a binary file’s contents as pixels to see if there are any patterns that don’t readily show up in your favourite hex editor.

P.S.

If you’re looking to poke at Win9x-era stuff too (eg. Win32 PE binaries), some of the listed tools support them and here are some additional tools you could try which were omitted from the previous lists for supporting neither MZ nor NE:

PE (Win32/Win64)

  • x64dbg (Open-source debugger)
  • OllyDbg (Shareware debugger, free registration but not needed for full function.)
  • Snowman [2] (Open-source decompiler, can run as an x64dbg plugin)
  • Boomerang (Open-source decompiler)
  • IDA Pro Freeware 7.0 (Non-commercial-only like v5.0. Supports 64-bit PE but drops MZ. Also adds Linux and MacOS versions.)
  • Ghidra (Open-sourced by the NSA. I’m unclear what formats other than PE are supported, but I’ve seen it described as being like IDA Pro but more free or like Radare but more mature.)
  • Borg Disassembler (info claims it to be freeware, but source is offered too)
  • Frida (Dynamic instrumentation framework, describes itself as “Greasemonkey for native apps”)
  • Binary Ninja (the cloud version is free, but you have to upload the binary to them)
  • Destroying x86_64 instruction decoders with differential fuzzing (Article on how and why reliably disassembling x86-family machine code has become such a hard problem)

Macromedia Director and Flash

  • Swifty Xena Pro for Windows (Extract SWFv4-6 and Macromedia Director v6-7 resource bundles from single-EXE projectors)
  • dirOpener (extract resources from Macromedia Director resource bundles (v8.5 and earlier). The original site is only on the Wayback Machine and they pulled the download links, but you can still use it as reference for the filenames to google. May need the SWA Decompression Xtra from the full Shockwave Player installer for some content.)
  • JPEXS [2] (a complete open-source reverse-engineering suite for Flash files)

Resource Rippers

  • Ripper v5.00 by J0nas for DOS (A multi-format freeware tool for extracting images, music, etc. from DOS-era resource bundles. Also mirrored locally.)
  • Multi-Ripper v2.60 by TWT for DOS (A multi-format shareware tool which may be useful for things that Ripper V5.00 fails on. Also mirrored locally.)
Posted in Retrocomputing | 6 Comments

Fanfiction – In Love of Quidditch

Posted on 2018-09-17 by Stephan Sokolow

Now for a bit of compare and contrast with a story that has some interesting characteristics.

In Love of Quidditch by Secondary Luminescence

This story shares a very similar premise to one of the best-written Harry Potter stories I’ve ever read… The Pureblood Pretense. In fact, judging by various plot elements, it’s actually a fanfic that does to The Pureblood Pretense what The Pureblood Pretense does to Tamora Pierce’s Song of the Lioness Quartet.

I don’t really want to call it a fix-fic, because I feel that doing so would be disrespectful to the amount of effort that went into changing things up. It’d be better to call it a different take on the same concept. An AU of an AU, per se. It’s not as original, even when you only consider the elements they don’t have in common, but it’s clear that Secondary Luminescence really tried their best. (The sequel has problems, but I’ll be covering it in a separate review.)

Now, given that Pureblood Pretense is richer and more engaging than some of the print novels I’ve read, while In Love of Quidditch is a good but otherwise ordinary fanfic, I’ll try not to compare them too much on how they achieved what they aimed for. Instead, I’ll focus mostly on what they intended to do and accomplishments that were attainable for both stories.

What makes In Love of Quidditch an interesting story to analyze is the way Secondary Luminescence used finesse to solve the large-scale weaknesses in The Pureblood Pretense’s plot, which murkybluematter just powered through on raw skill. (The latter being made even more impressive by the explanation I got from murkybluematter that those flaws exist because they weren’t taking it as seriously in the beginning when said flaws were established.)

Like The Pureblood Pretense, this story applies the broad strokes of Tamora Pierce’s Song of the Lioness Quartet to the Harry Potter setting: In an alternate wizarding world where a discriminatory law forbids her from pursuing her dream, a female Harry Potter trades places with a male relative in order to go to Hogwarts, disguised as a boy: In Pretense, studying potions under Professor Snape despite Hogwarts being for purebloods only. In this, playing quidditch despite women being forbidden from flying brooms.

In Pretense, Harry has a complete and loving family, which makes the deception more difficult to pull off while, in Quidditch, only James Potter and Remus Lupin are left, James cut off contact with Remus when the kids were 5, and Lily’s death has left him so distant and buried in his work as to be somewhat neglectful… making the deception much easier. (Though that does increase the risk of going in the other direction and making the story start to feel like hardship porn.)

Given that the most obvious form of discrimination was already taken by Pureblood Pretense, sports is a surprisingly well-considered alternative. There is a great deal of (under-taught) history surrounding sexist double-standards and outright prohibitions against women in the world of sports… not to mention that, for all it has appeared in artwork from time to time, riding a broom side-saddle as used to be expected of women on horses isn’t very practical.

That said, there is one major flaw which becomes obvious in hindsight later in the story. In Pureblood Pretense, Voldemort is still alive and reworked into the leader of the political party responsible for limiting Hogwarts to purebloods. It’s a clean and elegant way to justify a lot of other changes, and to shift many of the conflicts in the direction of political manoeuvring. In Love of Quidditch, on the other hand, makes a brief mention in chapter 1 that he hasn’t been sighted in six years and then reveals Quirrellmort, fairly unchanged and vulnerable to a similar “protection in Harry’s skin” despite Lily’s death being in childbirth, without any of the foreshadowing to justify that specific approach to things. This is sloppy compared to how well put together the rest of the story is and probably should have been my first hint at the flaws which crop up in the sequel.

Like both Pretense and Lioness, Quidditch only focuses on the experiential aspects of the gender-bending to the bare minimum necessary to hand-wave or justify bits of the plot. For example, mentioning her getting used to the feel of wearing boxers to set up how a prepubescent girl manages to get away with changing among the boys in the locker room.

(People who write gender-bending stories have a tendency to make the gender-bending itself the focus of the story and, while I do enjoy that too, it would be detrimental to the story in cases like this. Also, more generally, there’s a tendency for authors to lose perspective and have the story err too much on the side of gratifying what I refer to as their “non-sexual fiction kink”… a base interest that, while non-erotic, evokes similar emotional fixations. In other words, a strong antonym for “pet peeve”.)

As I mentioned in my review of it, the biggest weakness of The Pureblood Pretense is that “Rigel Black” is the type of literary hero who becomes a Mary Sue if written poorly. The success of the plot depends on her being the kind of prodigy that, while they exist (I was reading and understanding computer magazines at age 6), tend to feel uncomfortably convenient unless the author is so good that you’re having too much fun to question things. (thankfully, murkybluematter is that good.)

In Love of Quidditch does this differently, finding alternative plot points that are easier to justify. Here, the closest thing to being a hard-to-write prodigy that this Harry has is a love of flying stronger than in canon, a twin brother who was left terrified of it by a childhood accident, and a father who is so distant that, in the second book, it takes him a week to notice that she radically changed her hairstyle. (Even though it matters so much to him that, once he does notice, he grounds her until she agrees to use a hair regrowth potion… which she never does.)

Like canon Harry Potter, she’d do well in any house, but, unlike in The Pureblood Pretense, she not only refuses Slytherin because it would draw her father’s attention, she insists that the Sorting Hat use her memories of her brother to put her where it would have put him. Disgruntled, it shelves its second choice of Ravenclaw and puts her in Gryffindor. Also, like canon Harry Potter, she does accomplish things that hint at being magically powerful. (In canon, casting a patronus capable of driving off over a hundred dementors in his third year. In this story, casting a reparo powerful enough to fix the bathroom the troll trashed in her first year.) Both of these help to avoid the risk of her accomplishments feeling contrived when combined with her stated reasoning for studying like mad: To keep James Potter from having reason to come to Hogwarts and discover the deception.

Furthermore, unlike “Rigel Black”, she doesn’t keep her secret from everyone for years on end. Within the first few chapters, the Weasley Twins have figured it out (no doubt, thanks to the Marauder’s Map) and agreed to keep her secret in exchange for help in pulling off some of their pranks and getting material from the library. (After all, they did get banned from it for destroying some of the old newspapers that had her picture in them.)

By chapter 6, Madam Pomfrey has also found out, but her oaths prevent her from telling anyone and, during the encounter with Quirrellmort, he reveals the deception to Cedric Diggory, who is with Harry in this version of events, promises to keep her secret after it’s all over and done, and becomes more of a main character going forward.

This is a perfect example of the difference in approach. The Pureblood Pretense does what could be contrived, but you get so into the story that you don’t notice. This has the hero sometimes getting outplayed, but in ways where it makes perfect sense for it to further the plot, rather than ending it.

Now, there is a spot where the fic really convinced me of its intention to be an homage. In chapter 7, Harry’s efforts to be too perfect a student for James Potter to have reason to come to Hogwarts have caught Professor McGonagall’s attention. As a result, she gives Harry a book titled “Transfiguration Lessons for the Newfound Prodigy” and “his” thoughts on the matter are She knew she was good, but she wouldn’t have ever called herself a prodigy. That and the more subtle detail that, like Rigel, Harry’s effort to avoid drawing attention has backfired in some sense, are both elegant nods to murkybluematter’s work.

In a way, you could say that it’s like a fix-fic, but on a much more abstract level. It takes the concept of The Pureblood Pretense, and then does a good job of finding much less demanding ways to go about all the bits that make “Rigel Black” walk the line between a rough literary hero and an exceedingly polished Mary Sue.

Pretense definitely has a richer and more engaging cast of characters, but Quidditch isn’t exactly slacking and spends a fair bit of time exploring minor characters too. I especially enjoy how the Weasley twins wind up taking about as big a role in this as Ron did in canon and how Cedric Diggory starts to take on a significant role near the end. (The choice of the twins is quite the elegant one when you think about it. Not only are they Harry’s teammates, but it makes a surprising amount of sense for Ron to be rebuffed from befriending Harry by the amount of interest the Twins show in “him”.)

Some things are still a bit of a stretch, such as Harry learning sufficient legilimency so quickly after finding someone who can teach her, but it’s not immersion-breaking… especially in the context of Harry being a candidate for Ravenclaw and a voracious student. (And, also, it’s a side effect of borrowing a plot point from Pureblood Pretense which, in my opinion, cut off or postponed more productive elements of the narrative.)

On that note, now for the problems.

First, the most minor couple: I do think Hagrid’s accent is written a bit too thickly. I have to slow down and concentrate to make sense of what he’s saying on occasion and you don’t really want to pull the reader out of their immersion in the story like that. Also, the story uses “sorcerer’s stone” rather than “philosopher’s stone” which is a pet peeve of mine. Regardless of what American publishers say, the philosopher’s stone was the name of the real-life goal of real-life alchemy that Rowling was referencing.

Next, something that does work, but, as I mentioned, feels like it’s stifling stuff that the author had the potential to develop: While the mechanism and motive are different, it borrows the “sickness that traps people in their minds” idea from Pureblood Pretense (which it does make sufficiently fresh and interesting). The problem is how the side effect of doing so squashes the developing teacher-favoured student relationship between Harry and Professor McGonagall. Yes, it does make it easier to avoid Harry’s skill level feeling contrived, but I think what was lost was worth more than what was gained… especially when it could have instead been handled by reducing the progress Harry was making without the help a bit, so the results of the added help would be easier to justify to the readers.

This is the root of the biggest problem, as well as the core issue that causes so much trouble in the sequel: Secondary Luminescence seems to have trouble making the broad strokes of the plot truly original. Instead, borrowing bits from canon or bits from the Pureblood Pretense and reworking the details enough to keep them interesting.

In this book, the biggest problem manifests in the climax. For all the mystery built around the crisis of the year, the climax winds up being Quirrellmort, when there’s practically no mention of Voldemort or Quirrell in the story up to that point. That could still work… but not when you just assume details like Harry’s blood protection which depended on canon events which didn’t happen in this version of the story.

All in all, while it does stick closer to the source material than would be best for it, it mostly manages to form its own identity, leaving a sense that it’s adapting ideas from The Pureblood Pretense in the same way that The Pureblood Pretense adapts ideas from the Song of the Lioness Quartet.

It may not have murkybluematter’s “5 out of 5 is an understatement” writing skill, but, it’s still got an uncommon amount of novelty worked into the events and character relationships. Even with the “comes out of left field” aspect of some of the details from the climax, Secondary Luminescence has done a good job of switching up the “flavour text” enough to make familiar events interesting again.

(Including one change which is noteworthy enough that I want to mention it. When you’re writing an Alternate Universe fic like this one, you’re allowed some leeway to bend the “single divergence point” rule of good fanfiction as long as the changes feel sufficiently unimportant. In this case, it’s used to have Harry and friends assume that Fluffy is male but then have Hagrid correct them on that. It’s a nice little way to poke at the human tendency to make assumptions about gender based on preconceptions and unrelated characteristics as long as you don’t take such opportunities often enough for it to become gratuitous.)

I’d give it a 4.3 out of 5… and it would have been a 4.5 out of 5 with a fix to the climax. (And it definitely helps that, if you explain it to someone else, there’s no need for any “Trust me. The author makes it work.” justifications.)

Finally, to address the elephant in the room. Yes, the title does annoy the crap out of me. My inner pedant can’t help but scream that “In Love of Quidditch” is wrong and it should be “For Love of Quidditch”, dammit!.

Posted in Fanfiction | Leave a comment

How to Copy-Paste YouTube Comments With Formatting in Firefox

Posted on 2018-09-10 by Stephan Sokolow

TL;DR: Copy more. Extending your selection outside the comment body will prevent the bug from triggering.

For the last little while, I’d been suffering from an annoying bug where, if I tried to copy and paste YouTube comments, I’d lose all the line breaks and have one big ugly wall of text.

I finally decided to go to Bugzilla and report it, only to discover that someone else had reported it two years ago and there appeared to be no progress, so I decided to see if I could figure out what was going on… and not only did I narrow it down to something actionable, I realized why I had only started to suffer from it much more recently.

YouTube serves up its comments in a custom HTML element named <yt-formatted-string> and, in the DOM inspector, it looked like the element contained exactly the problem text I was getting when I tried to copy and paste.

At first, this had me worried, as visions of custom rendering and esoteric bugs danced through my head but, as I continued to poke around, I noticed two things:

First, it actually did have the line breaks… but as raw, plaintext newlines (\n in views showed all characters). That prompted a suspicion, which revealed the second thing…

They’re using white-space: pre-wrap to ask the browser to render that “plaintext” as it’s meant to be.

It was then I had a bit of a “No. It couldn’t be that simple.” moment.

Sure enough, when I popped over to jsBin and added these active ingredients, I was able to reproduce the bug:

<style>
  div { white-space: pre-wrap; }
</style>
[...]
<div>
  some

  text

  with

  newlines
</div>

Firefox has a bug with copying and pasting any text that’s set to white-space: pre-wrap;!

…but then why didn’t I trigger it before? I actually discovered that completely by accident, when I got a bit sloppy and impatient. If you begin your text selection outside the pre-wrapped element, then it copies properly!

For YouTube, I used to copy the entire comment, including the header, in one go, and then edit out all the cruft that got picked up in between the username and the content, which protected me from the bug.

In hindsight, that does make sense. This isn’t the only circumstance I’ve run into where Firefox may not give the clipboard what you expect if you begin and end your selection in the right place. (I’ve also seen it happen when copy-pasting fragments of <p> tags into my fanfiction quotes bin, which is from a normal website into a contenteditable element in a form, also being rendered by Firefox.)

EDIT: And I’ve now tracked down and reported that other bug too.

Posted in Web Wandering & Opinion | 2 Comments